Obligatory Year-end Blog post

Well, 2013 is over, and it's been another fabulous year.  There are still a few blog posts coming for adventures in 2013 (Elton John concert, Christmas tree farm in the snow), but even aside from my adventures, I've had a great year full of fun things that were not always blogged about (or happened before this blog began).

Being a 29 year old single gal can be hard at times, but it also has some amazing benefits.  Sure, it's nice not to have to answer to anyone else.  But, to me it's really about the more adventurous and open attitude I have during my single periods.  I don't usually date someone who restricts my activity, but I WANT to participate more in life with my family and friends when I don't have the safety net of a good man to catch me.

So, a huge, giant, wonderful, appreciative thank you to all the wonderful people who I spent time with, spend time talking to, or who have made a big impact on my single life.  I love you all, and I'd be truly miserable without my friends and family.

And here's why the single life is fabulous:

1) You're free to buy as many baby clothes as you want for a future, unborn child, and no one thinks it's creepy.  (At least, no one has a right to say it.)

2)  You get to deal with this on your own.  WAIT, nevermind, that is NOT a perk of being single.

3)  You can make wonderful memories such as this one:

But no really, how sweet is this?  I cherish being able to vacation with my family and make these memories.

4)  Beautiful weather, loud music, windows down cruises

5) And oh the concerts... This year, I've seen the Lumineers, the Backstreet Boys, New Kids on the Block, 98 Degrees, Keith Urban, Dierks Bentley, Kenny Chesney, Eric Church...

6)  THIS:

7)  And of course, all the wonderful times with friends: (of course, this isn't everyone... love you all!)

So, HAPPY HOLIDAYS, my friends!  Love and blessings to you, from me and Moosie:

And happy trails to you, in 2014 :)

Misadventures in dating.

So... I'm a cheater.  I know that I've explained that the whole point of this journey and blog is to take my mind off of dating all the time, but I'm human.

In what may be the most self-confidence destroying move of 2013, I signed up for Eharmony (long before this journey began).  As they suckered me into a great deal for a year's worth of membership and I can't leave until I've gotten my money's worth, I've occasionally chatted with people there, but haven't gone out on a single date since my 29th birthday.  A friend convinced me to try out a new site "Coffee Meets Bagel" and I agreed to try that with him also.  Since my dating life is typically a comedy of errors, I haven't REALLY cheated on my tiny adventures mission until a few weeks ago when I planned a date.

So, this Coffee Meets Bagel site is brilliant in theory since it supposedly matches you up with someone you have mutual friends with on Facebook.  In the true spirit of dating as a late 20 year old, me and my friends give everyone an appropriate nickname to keep men straight... so I met "Cartman" on the site and we began text messaging on their text messaging line service, which is kind of brilliant since it allows you to text with someone without sharing your real number.  We traded messages almost daily for about two weeks, and he suggested we meet up.  We made plans for a specific day, and we texted once more about them when I had to change the plans to a casual lunch date since a friend was having "Friendsgiving" and friends and food obviously outrank potentially bad dates in my book.

The day came and went, and I didn't hear from Cartman a few days beforehand, or for about a week afterwards.  About a week later, I had pretty much forgotten about him (score one for my year of adventure if I can forget about someone that quickly!) when I got a strange voicemail that was mumbled and mostly unintelligible.  I texted the following day, and he immediately asked me to hang out the following weekend.  I was busy, but also asked... "what happened to you last weekend?"  He said he owed his uncle one, and had lunch with him instead.... UM.... coulda called buddy.  He suggested we hang out during the following week, and I stopped responding to give it some real thought.

Deep down, I just didn't WANT to give this another shot, but it took me a while to come up with why.  Since my last relationship, I've dated a few people, but while we kept talking and continued a friendship, no one has been willing to make any kind of commitment to me.  I couldn't figure out why I was attracting this kind of person until this conversation with Cartman.  After thinking quite a bit about this situation, I realized that there came a time in each one of those friendships/relationships, where this kind of thing had happened, and I had given those guys another chance, or sometimes 2 or 3 more chances.  At heart, I'm just a hopeful person about love, but because of this, I think I've wasted plenty of time with people who clearly showed me exactly how things were going to be.

I talked to a few friends who both encouraged me to give Cartman a chance, but I didn't respond right away because I knew I REALLY didn't want to meet up with him.  I knew that I deserved better, and maybe that is part of this journey even though I originally meant the journey to be more of a man-free one.

A few days later, Cartman offered to tell me a story about his day, and gave me a call.  I literally understood NOTHING he said, and asked "WHAT?" about a hundred times in a 20 minute conversation.  I didn't get his sense of humor, and he literally talked like Cartman from South Park (hence the nickname).  Seeing as how I couldn't carry on a conversation with him, I went with my original feelings and decided not to go out on this date.

Because I deserve better.  And maybe we have to show the universe what kind of love we want to receive with the actions we take.

Always go with your gut.  Lesson Learned!

Whales, whales and more... Okay, no whales.

First, my apologies for getting behind on the blogging portion of this project.  I went whale watching at the end of October, but it's the holiday season so the blogging hasn't come easy... but here we go!

If you know me, you know I LOVE the ocean.  The beach is the one place that brings me peace and I love to go at any time of year.  Admittedly, I have been on a whale watch before about a year and a half ago, but this time would be different, because Lori and I planned our trip during Whale migration season!

We also planned our trip during the coldest possible time to do a whale watch... Exhibit A:

We <3 whales!  (And the Flyers obviously!)

We headed out from the Cape May Whale Watch and Research Center (http://www.capemaywhalewatch.com/).  In the spirit of my year of adventure, I was sure that I'd see a whale.  On my last Whale/Dolphin watch, we saw an amazing super pod of dolphins, about 100 dolphins splashing and playing around.  So, I knew we'd see something.

The trip started out with some interesting information that I was not aware of.  The Cape May area actually has the 2nd largest fishery in the United States (Lund's), 2nd only to Gloucester, Massachusetts.  The area also provides about 90% of the clams eaten in the United States.  And about 80% of gasoline used in the U.S. passes through our waters headed to Philadelphia.  Fascinating!

As you can see from my title, we did NOT see any whales, which surely would have been one of the most thrilling moments of my life so far.  We also didn't see much of dolphins either, only got a quick glimpse.  Our Captain tried very hard to find a whale for us, and we did a lot of circling, but more on that in a moment.  Because we didn't really see marine mammals, we actually got our tickets validated for a future trip.  I thought for sure that our glimpse of dolphin meant that we would NOT get a free trip, so I was pleased and surprised when they said they'd come around to write on our tickets that we could come back for free.  I highly recommend the Starlight Fleet and Cape May Whale Watch and Research Center because of this!  Their staff was also very knowledgeable and I enjoyed talking to one of the gals on board for a few moments about some of the cool stuff they see.  They do sometimes see sharks (WOOHOO!) and over the summer, had gotten to see a great hammerhead shark circling the boat and then going after an injured sea turtle.  Hopefully, on a future trip we can see a shark too!

We did see quite a few jellyfish, which had me a little worried about the ecosystem, but they still looked pretty cool.

The real adventure came from our pursuit of whales.  About halfway through the trip, the wind picked up a bit.  We headed down to the front of the boat for a change of scenery.  At the same time, the Captain picked up speed trying to get to a location where a whale had been spotted earlier.  We were rolling back and forth quite a lot, but luckily, neither Lori nor I have a history of seasickness.  I was a BIT uneasy standing close to the rail when the boat was catching air going through the waves, so I tried to sit down.  I took one step back and basically fell right onto the bench behind us.  Lori stayed where she was and a minute later, we hit another wave and caught a mouth of saltwater.  She also fell right into the seat and a few minutes later, one of the gals on board asked us to move to the sides of the boat because the Captain didn't want anyone in the front.  I would think the Captain would try not to drive a big tourist boat like a bat outta hell, but it did provide a little excitement in the day.  It was a great help in determining that I am NOT the seasick type, so I guess we did learn something anyway!

Afterwards, we visited my favorite shore point, Cape May for a bit.  It was a great day, but next time, I hope there are whales, and of course, SHARKS!

Before I leave you with some pictures of the trip, I'd like to send a big shoutout to my first readers I am aware of that are not people who are obligated to love me, and therefore, my blog.  Hello, Texans!  Maybe we can do the same adventure separately in the future and we can have a little guest blogging action here!

Cape May

The Cape May Lighthouse

Apparently, our waters are green because they are so rich with algae and plankton!

National Museum of Jewish American History, and lots of beers

Despite having a few Jewish friends, I don't know too much about Jewish American history, and Philly opened a whole museum on it a few years ago, so it seemed like it was time to learn more.  I love to learn, so this seemed like a logical tiny adventure for me.  I wouldn't say I exactly have a brain for history facts, and though I've spent considerable time over the years learning history in school, I've spent much less time forgetting just about all of it.  So I'll probably remember very little of what I learned during my visit.. but here goes...

To begin with, here's a lovely photo of the PATCO parking lot in Collingswood:

"Why?" you may ask... because lonely people at the train station play with their phones.  YES that's right, I TOOK THE TRAIN ALONE!  Okay, people have been doing that forever, but I was still proud of myself, especially since at the bridge portion of the train ride, I usually begin thinking about trains falling off bridges.  But, I didn't this time, and I made it all the way to Philly by myself!  GO ME!

When Ali, Bob and I arrived at the National Museum of Jewish American History, they were having a "Pay what you want" type deal, which may or may not be a regular thing on Saturdays.  They did, however, leave the admission price up on the board over top of where you pay your admission.  Interestingly, two out of 3 of us paid the regular admission price.  Interesting marketing idea to leave up the amount so that many people (if not, most!) will feel guilty about paying anything less than the full price.

The top floor was an exhibit on Ezra Jack Keats.  I'll admit that I forgot what his name was, but a google search of "jewish black children's books" yielded his name for me.  It was quite memorable that this Jewish man chose to portray the issues that black children face.  It shows some solidarity among groups that have been discriminated against.  His illustrations were so interesting, and I highly recommend checking out his work.  They had original storyboards, that shows sketchings and 3D effects for the pages.  Very cool stuff.

While I tried to look overly scholarly since I was with intelligent peers, I did find the museum to be very wordy.  I'm sharing a few pictures from my favorite parts below:

Bob in the "Oregon Trail" type room

Original Levi Strauss jeans, looking amazingly like modern jeans!

                                                Some kind of Gala representation                            

                                This book page is shaped like a  butt.... but is it really a chair?

                                                           Oh look, a doghouse!

As you can see from the photos above, I am not as cultured as I once thought before this experience.  I did, in fact, enjoy anything that was for children in the place.  Oh well, I tried.

A few interesting things that I did learn (and retain!):

1. Levi Strauss was Jewish (see jeans above).  I also thought he was a refugee, but apparently, that was another Levi Strauss (Claude) so yeah, I should have read a little more at the museum... haha.
2. Jewish families moved to the suburbs, just like other families.  See doghouse above.
3. Summer camps were also apparently very popular among Jewish Americans.
4. Hollywood was virtually DOMINATED by Jewish Americans back in the day.  MGM and Columbia for instance were controlled by Jewish Americans.
5. Irving Berlin, Jewish American, wrote "White Christmas," one of the most popular Christmas songs of all time!
6. Even though we think of Europe as the place where Jewish Americans emigrated from, there are many other areas.  Many of the immigrants talked about in the exhibits had Spanish sounding names.

Lots of interesting things to learn if you go to check it out!

After this very cultural event, we went to Bloktoberfest on South Street, which was my first beer festival!  I wasn't feeling that well, so I only tasted a few things, but I loved the Cider that I tried, by Original Sin Cider.  I also tried several beers which I didn't really like, but since I have a tendency to NOT enjoy fancy beers, I'll refrain from smearing their names here....

                         Me and Bob and Ali enjoying some beer after a very cultural day.

We also ran into a few friends there, which just goes to show that our crew is more likely to be found where the beer is, than where the culture is!

After enjoying Bloktoberfest, we also went to the Boot and Saddle, which is my new favorite city bar!  It's a somewhat country, somewhat hipster bar, which is decorated pretty country, so I felt right at home.  They also have a room for live shows, which I know I'll be visiting again.  Here's a few photos:

                            Third wheelin' it.  Quite possibly, my theme for this year....

                                      John joined us for this portion of the evening.

My only regret is that I did not wear my cowboy boots for this outing, to show how truly country I am.  At least compared to the hipsters!

After a super eventful day, I was back home and in my pajamas by about 11 pm.  I am almost 30, after all.

Next up.... a whale watch... did we see a whale?  STAY TUNED!

Funny or Die in Camden (or die): My First Celebrity Comedy Show!

For my special year of adventure ahead, I have a list of tiny adventures to accomplish.  I won't list any here, because I want the upcoming blogs to be full of surprises (oooooh! ahhhh!), but my next adventure was one I just stumbled on.

As I'm sure a lot of you can relate to, I have a habit of snarkily trolling Facebook.  I would love to say I am just checking in with my friends that live all over the place, but I'd be lying if I said I was just doing that.  Of course, I love love LOVE seeing what all the people I care about are up to... but there are invariably those Facebook posts that I love to hate.  You know the posts... the endless hashtags, the endless brags, total inappropriateness, duck faces, people airing their dirty laundry in public (in a much more inappropriate fashion than blogging...)  Honestly, just now, I had to sign on to Facebook to see if there were any posts that I needed to take photos of and send to my friends.  You've been warned.

On this particular day, I saw a post by one of my best guy friends and former hubby (of the playground), Bob, asking if anyone wanted to go see Dave Chappelle in September at the Funny or Die Comedy Festival in, of all places, Camden, NJ.  While typically Camden is more die than funny, it seemed like a fabulous idea since I have fond memories of watching Dave Chappelle stand-up on many a late night with my Freshman year roomie, Jo Jo.  "Look at him... he LOVES it... just like it says in the encyclopedia!"  Also, I figured this was a wonderful opportunity to post about my fabulous life on Facebook and make everyone else jealous for a change.

About two weeks before this, I moved into my new office at work, and after a week in my new environment, I got a severe case of "allergies," which may or may not be a direct result of the building I work in.  At least that's what I'm going with.  On the day of Funny or Die, I may or may not have had a fever, but I'm all about perseverance when it comes to something fun, so I spent the day directly denying illness, including at the event itself where I most likely passed on my illness to anyone within breathing distance (you're welcome).  I also needed to meet Bob and his friend at the event, so I had to drive the 25 or so minutes and find parking (which this summer was a nightmare) and then walk through the streets of Camden alone.  I'm from Gboro and spent a little over a year working in Camden, so I like to think of myself as some kind of street-wise bad ass, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I thought of bailing due to sickness/walking alone through Camden (which if not the murder capital of the US this year, at least SEEMS like it to those of us who live near it!)  But, I persevered, found the best parking lot EVER, and walked to the venue feeling very empowered and independent (woo!).

The comedy was FUNNY.  I laughed a lot.  Comedians included Hannibal Buress (still not sure who he is), Kristen Schaal (literally, had no idea that I knew who she was before that, but seriously she's everywhere), Al Madrigal (seriously my new favorite comedian besides Dave Chappelle), Jeff Ross (forgot he was there at all), Flight of the Conchords (where have I been?  I didn't even know they were a band!) and of course... Dave Chappelle!  Just days before, Dave Chappelle had been heckled so badly in Connecticut, that he walked off the stage after remaining silent for the rest of his contracted minutes, which led to not only him joking about bombs falling on CT, but also to very strict rules about not using cell phones at ALL, including sending a text message.  This may have just been a rule for the festival in general, but since the signs also explicitly said "No Heckling" I will blame it on that CT incident.  The following is a quick breakdown of my thoughts on each performer:

Hannibal Buress:  I honestly can't even tell you for sure that I saw him perform, but according to the website, he was there.  Whoever the first performer was, he was amusing, and I did laugh out loud, but compared to the funny-ness to come, he was just alright.

Kristen Schaal:  While she does have a funny, little girl voice, I didn't really like her dramatic monologues.  Otherwise, she was amusing.
                                                   

oh hey, look at this tiny picture i stole from online... but I bet you recognize her and didn't know her name just like me!

Al Madrigal: HILARIOUS.  He talked a lot about his family and the Latinos in his neighborhood.  The bit about his kid's birthday party is a must-see, if you ever have a chance to see his stand-up.  I really appreciate stand-up when it's about regular life because small ironies really crack me up, so he was GREAT.

Jeff Ross:  I forgot he was there, I think we must have been getting Chickie and Pete's crabfries at this time.  Priorities.

Flight of the Conchords:  It was hard to understand them at times, so I felt a bit at a disadvantage for not knowing their material beforehand.  I laughed a bit, but I felt like their set was a little long.  I would probably enjoy them a lot more if I was more familiar with them from their show.
                                                     

while i stole this picture from online, it's exactly what a picture with my cell phone would have looked like anyway...hehe

Dave Chappelle:  BEST EVER.  My favorite joke... when talking about the city of Camden, "I know Campbell Soup is made in New Jersey," he responded. "I can taste the anger in the recipe." (stolen from Philly.com's article).  I literally laughed from beginning to end of his set, including him talking shit on Hartford, CT "You know how scary it is to get booed by a room full of people with alligators and shit on their shirts?"  I can only hope they were filming at least one of his shows so that you can all see it!

picture above, stolen from Google image, for fear of being thrown out of the show.

Despite this being a barrel of laughs, many important lessons were learned.  They are as follows:

1)  Anheuser-Busch, we salute you.  Bob and his friend Joel were about halfway through their cans of Bud Light Lime-a-ritas when Joel began giggling at something BESIDES the hilarious comedy show we were watching.  It only took a quick glance at the can to find that its alcohol by volume value was 8%, thus making it the best $13.00 can of beer ever.

2)  Susquehanna Bank Center ushers mean business.  I literally got told by 3 ushers about the no phone rule, while being scolded by one even though I showed no sign of using a phone at all.  During the Flight of the Conchords set, a guy behind us got THROWN OUT for being on his cell phone, even though he clearly was not taking photos or videos of any kind.  Lesson learned.  I also learned that not using my phone for a few hours leads to withdrawal symptoms in smartphone addicts, but hey, it was probably good for me to be disconnected for a few hours.

3)  Male comedians are funnier than female comedians.  I'm completely biased, but I'm pretty sure I only find male comedians truly funny.  Prove me wrong, female comedians of the world!

4)  Even when Dave Chappelle visits, the Susquehanna Bank Center is a surprisingly white crowd.  In fact, the place was packed with hipsters, HUGE surprise.

5)  Yes, people do tailgate for comedy shows. Surprise!

6)  Following the crowd is not an effective method for finding your way to a concert venue.  A cop literally had to tell a line of concertgoers to move THREE times because a car was behind them (and I do mean, right behind them).  I also watched people cut through a parking lot and then have to climb under a fence (nooo thank you), and then another group ducked under a barrier, only to have to jump a fence on the other side.  Groupthink is not necessarily the best think.  Proud to say I was not one of the ducks following in a row like those other idiots (and I did have a nice chuckle in my head, snarky facebook style at their antics!)

7)  The best way to truly connect with your venue, is to make fun of their home-city.  Instant respect.

8) Nice guys do not always finish last. After the show, I returned to my bad ass parking lot to find that it would be super easy to get out.  However, after getting into my car, turning it on, and putting my blinker on, three cars would literally not let me out, despite everyone knowing that the obvious rule is one and one.  So, I sat there while all these stupid, rude people sat in traffic facing the other way, while blocking me in.  After a few minutes, I did something like an 8 point turn, to effectively maneuver around this line, so that I could go left instead of right.  After I passed the car directly to my left, I glided around to the main line of traffic, and turned left out of the lot before any of those fools even moved from the spot they were at.  BOOM.  That's how it's done, my friends.

In conclusion, I love Dave Chappelle, and beating rude people in traffic.  Until next time...

#tinyadventure

Learning to Love Me

Like a lot of little girls, I was raised on the princess ideal.  For a long time (possibly until this year), I thought that eventually the perfect Prince would come and sweep me off my feet.  We’d live happily ever after, of course.  But, I’ve ended up wondering if I can sit around waiting or if I should find a way to make my own happy ending.

           

A few weeks ago, I met up with my college roommate.  While we both at one time could have been voted “Most Likely to Be a Disney Princess,” we are both living seemingly the opposite life that we had envisioned.  At almost 30, she is an Officer in the Army, living as a high ranking woman in a man’s world, while I am living with my parents, working a part-time job with a Masters degree.  And though we surely have a lot to be thankful for, we found ourselves in a discussion about family.  As if she was viewing a window into my soul, she said, “I just can’t believe where I’m at right now.  I thought I’d have a couple kids by now.”  While I emphatically nodded my tiara-less head, I wondered if these dreams had been holding us back from appreciating and experiencing life.

I’ve often thought about writing a book about dating and challenging myself.  In said book, I would go out on one date a week.  I’d learn all kinds of things about myself, and in the end, I’d be happy with my own life and also, find the man of my dreams.  But, this diary won’t be about that for two reasons.  For one, I’m realizing that I’ve been trying that method all along and I don’t seem to be any happier AND I’m still alone.  And also, I’m in the driest dry spell of my life and I’m not sure I could come up with a date in the next SIX MONTHS, let alone in the next week.

           

So instead, I’d like to use this project to NOT make dating a priority in the next year.  However, in all honesty, I’m no Mother Theresa (although I hope to be closer by the end of this journey!), so I can make no promises that I will exercise self-control and turn down any man that crosses my path.  You can all hope that fate smiles (frowns?) upon this mission, and no man comes along this year.  (And hey, so maybe I’m not hoping for the same thing, but I just decided TODAY that this path was necessary, and I’m still not entirely sure I want to commit to being alone until the big 3-0 birthday!)

I turned 29 about a month ago, and while my birthday is usually met with a wave of anxiety and depression at not being where I thought I’d be at said age, this year was different.  I had decided a few weeks before my birthday that this year, I’d make my own rules.  Charge forward with this project in the spirit of adventure and discovery.  I quickly realized that I had no real financial backing for this project, so the rhinoceros charge towards life that I had imagined would be more like an antelope’s first steps after birth, but still, I was excited.

I’ve spent the majority of the past 29 years alone, but I guess that shouldn’t be a big surprise considering I was a child for most of it.  It seems a little more unique that here, at 29 years old, I am still alone, when just about everyone I know is settled down, or beginning to settle down with their “person.” (So yes, friends, I endorse and support your current relationships, you’re welcome.)  This plan all began because I am alone, but as I told my friends excitedly about my plans, I realized I wasn’t truly alone.  Many of you have jumped aboard hoping to experience some of my small adventures with me.  Even when I am down about feeling “alone,” I know that I am truly blessed to have my family and friends there for me.  Please remember that if my bitter, snarky side shines through in this journal.

So, while everyone I currently know is busy enjoying their lives with their boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/partner, I will spend this year learning how to really love me.  I will challenge myself in some small way and share my thoughts here.  You may not find every challenge or adventure to be particularly brave of me, but I think it’s at least mildly brave to go against the grain of every fairy tale perpetually reinforced by our society and my overactive romantic brain.  I also pledge to provide evidence in the form of lengthy descriptions or pictures where appropriate, when my adventures crash and burn in embarrassing and funny ways.  Based on my 29 years thus far, this should be promising enough for you to stay tuned.

           

So here we go… on the road to self-actualization and self-love, all before my 30^th birthday.  Suggestions for more challenges welcome….